Careless book geek

When I've first started reading this book, I thought it was trying to be funny. I thought that maybe the thing it was doing is that it put all these ridiculous events and bunch of stereotypes and made fun of it all. But as I read on, I realized that... actually no, this book was trying to be serious. Shocking, I know, because this is such an unrealistic, ridiculous book full of stereotypes it made me cringe so bad I thought my face was going to fall off.

Don't let the premise fool you, this is not a love/hate book, this is not a book dealing with coming out, struggling with it and such and it is in no way tragical. It's just a lot of dumb girls acting smart and destroying things and acting like they know everything there is to know.

First off, I'd like to start with Clarissa's... coming out. If you could even call it that. You know, as an actual person who clarifies herself as bi, I found it extremely offensive and just plain dumb. Not one queer person looks herself in a mirror one day and says "Oh hey, I'm going to be bi!!! Girls and boys are pretty!!! Oh yeah!!!" That's why I was thinking that maybe author was trying to make it funny because conservative straight people make it out to be this way, but no! That was actually motherfucking serious coming out!! Just... what the fuck? You don't look at a girl one day and go all "I'm bi, hihihihi." She just decides that she's bi. There's literally a quote in a book that says that but I'm too tired to try to find it now. I've known my whole life I was attracted to girls and boys both and okay, of course that one day it just became more obvious and accepted it with a bit of a freak out, but I certainly didn't smile and laugh while saying "I'm bi!!!!!" and announcing it to everyone I do and don't know just right after I decided that I'm bi. I'm actually baffled because this is not a joke. I seriously am.

And when we're with Clarissa already... how is she supposed to be smart? I don't get it. She's actually the stupidest person on the planet most of the time (or all the time really). She actually starts doubting that she's bi the next day she comes out because she has never kissed a girl, so she goes to the girl she sees on the street and kisses her. I mean, what? And then she's all "Oh yesss, that's the best kiss ever I'm totally bi!!!!" Do you see now why I thought this was some kind of a joke? Do you?

She's all pouty and pretty and she laughs a lot and she didn't know there are actual money problems until her family's house is put for foreclosure (she doesn't know what that and mortgage is before that happens.... I mean, come on now!). But somehow, she's praised by the fucking lawyer of her knowledge and is offered a job just because her lovely girlfriend knows some shit. I did whole facepalm thing after that. The whole novel through, Clarissa is this stupid girl who knows nothing about the world and then suddenly, we're told she's smart enough to work for a lawyer? Give me a fucking break.

Then we have Lexie. She'd be a somehow decent character if it weren't for all the stereotypes surrounding her. She's a vegan, she's all tomboyish, she's a punk, she's a smartass and she doesn't like people. What a shocker. She doesn' believe Clarissa's really bi (I don't too, but Lexie, you're just a softie) and she thinks Clarissa's stupid and all of that. I wished that has lasted throughout the whole book. I'd maybe even like Lexie if that remained. But of course, we don't actually get any sort of hate because they become quick besties and then girlfriends for half an hour (and Lexie gives Clarissa a ring for it????????????) and then.... *drum roll* ANGSTTTTTTT!!!!!!

It gets so fucking angsty over such dumb things that I couldn't believe what I was actually reading. One more proof that Clarissa is the dumbest girl ever and that Lexie is becoming stupider and stupider as the novel goes on. Both of them just become slowly more and more unlikable through the novel until you actually can't stand any of them and you want to throw your copy (or tablet, in my case) across the room.

You know, I was thinking of giving this book 2 stars just because the writing wasn't so bad and I gave many bad books higher rating just because of it, but then that one thing happen that I just couldn't turn a blind eye to, and I couldn't make myself give it any more than this.

Did you know that the actual thing that happens in this novel is that these two girls destroy Clarissa's former home with a fucking bulldozer?? That they have no idea how to use except that they've watched some movie that showed how to do it?? And that says it's not easy?? But they're so great at it they destroy it all! Oh and then there's a police chasing them and they leave their ski masks in the bushes! Are you kidding me? How fucking dumb are you? I don't know if police finds them because of course it's nowhere written but if you're going to commit a crime, then do it properly!

And then, guess what, they don't get busted by the police! Because good ol' Lexie's daddy is a rich man who will lie for his daughter and her girlfriend and then will punish his daughter real, real bad (and he doesn't even tell Clarissa's parents. They know nothing. Really. No joking here). If this were the real life, they'd be in jail in no time. Of course, they don't regret a thing and Clarissa would do it again. *facepalm*

Also, another thing what I didn't like what how poorly the money subject was done. It draws throughout the whole book just to be all fine and dandy in the end. Just like that.

Other characters in the book were just - there. Even Desi, Clarissa's sister with a Down syndrome, was just there so this novel would get sympathetic looks. Every character was emotionless through the whole book, and when the author was trying to write emotions, it felt so forced and so out-of-place I couldn't believe it.

Overall, the whole book was too unrealistic for a "realistic fiction" and too ridiculous to be believable. I'm sorry, but I didn't enjoy it one bit.